Wednesday, July 6, 2011

When You Ask, Be Ready

"7 “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. 8 For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened." - Matthew 7:7-8

In January, after reading the above verse, I asked the Lord to open my eyes to my faults. When He had done so I knew what I needed to pray for: compassion. I was dry and hard to the people around me; I wasn’t able to empathize like I had previously. I was sarcastic, cynical and mean. My heart was cold and broken and I hated (and still hate) that feeling.

I prayed and sought and practically beat the preverbal door down requesting to be given compassion. In the exercise of pleading with the Lord my heart began to change. I started praying more earnestly for others and this city and also in my prayer group. The Holy Spirit was (and is) working diligently.

The Lord has made it evident that my heart is starting to crack and melt like hot coffee over ice. I know that the progress is slow (both because I’m stubborn and I’m an imperfect sinner) but really, the little progress the Lord makes when He gently wraps His hand around my heart  to squeeze and force the compassion out like water from a sponge is mammoth to my little soul. I start to feel supple oft rushes over me with such force and determination that I must stop to catch my breath.

The Lord has started to give me compassion for the broken city of Berkeley, compassion for the people in the East Bay that are ignorant of His love, grace and mercy,  compassion for my companions both in the East Bay and in Berkeley and hardest of all compassion for my family.

I am in awe that the Lord saw fit to fix me. He took me 4 years ago by the collar of my shirt pulled me out of the miry clay, set me upon solid ground and from that day He hasn’t stopped training me up to be the woman that He wants me to be. Thanks, Lord.

View from my roof looking out to the marina.

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